ChangeForge: Control the Airwaves

ChangeForge is a nationally recognized blog that normally has high standards for their content. Today, they have lowered those standards a little and posted a piece written by yours truly. Please give it a look and leave a comment on their blog for me! http://www.changeforge.com/2009/02/05/control-the-airwaves/

Happiness

Of course, I want to teach my kids everything I know: especially the knowledge I gained the hard way. But what if you could only teach them one thing? [Don't focus on why you can only teach them one thing, just humor the exercise and isolate the most important thing you know.

I found this aphorism from Michel de Montaigne that captures the one thing I think my offspring need to know:

The man who is happy is not he who is believed to be so but he who believes he is so. (Geary's Guide to the World's Greatest Aphorisms by James Geary, page 128.)

If I had known this principle as a younger man, I could have wasted less time and focused more on lasting happiness. The quick-fix happiness I sought in booze, girls, games, food, TV, and many other trivial pursuits did not return anything over time.

Imagine your happiness is measurable. Your happiness starts at zero, and you have a beer to push it up to a "1". After six beers, are you at a happiness level of "6"? Maybe, but there is a law of diminishing returns that applies here. At some point, you have one too many beers. The hangover itself will sap your happiness level, and that is in addition to any errors of judgement you may have committed while intoxicated. No matter what, you always lose the happiness that each beer brought. Beer/Food/Drugs/etc do not leave a residual happiness, they wear off.

Reset your happiness meter and lets try another exaple. Starting at "0" you turn on TV and find a new episode of your favorite TV show. Happiness level soars to a "10" while the show is on, drops to a "5" immediately after, and then registers a zero once it has left your short-term memory. If you were supposed to be doing something else instead of watching TV at that time, then the drop off will be steeper and deeper. TV does not produce a residual happiness.

Now a better way, in my opinion: Do something for a relationship that you don't feel like doing. Give a back rub, cook something that you don't like but that person does, listen to a boring story enthusiastically, or let them control the TV remote tonight. The happiness meter starts at zero, plunges into negative numbers for a brief time, and then slowly climbs to about a "2". Two years later, you recall a time when you did this selfless act and find that it still provides a residual level "2" happiness. If you can amass an impressive history of selfless acts, you will notice two things. First, they add up to a higher level of residual happiness (which means they cause your happiness to sit at a constant level "10" or higher, even in the darkest of times. Second, the object of your selfless acts will probably reciprocate, which both spikes your happiness and raises the residual happiness level.

My young kids can't really learn it yet. They have a lot of living to do before they know how true this aphorism is. Therefore, the best way for me to teach them now is by my example. I hope they see me working on my happiness, and actively choosing happiness. I hope that they intuitively choose happiness, regardless of what their friends say or what conventional wisdom has decided. I hope that they see the difference between short-term happiness and long-term happiness.

2009 may be a really hard year. If it is, I think I am ready to be happy anyway. I am hoping that everyone is surprised by how well 2009 treats us, and that happiness comes easily. If not, I plan to keep investing in those long-term happiness builders that I find with my kids, wife, extended family, charity, and self-improvement.

I hope your 2009 is filled happiness! Thanks for reading my blog.

Fat, Forty, and Fired

Another random encounter has turned out well for me. While entering the local library one day, I glanced at the “Friends of the Library” bookstore that is in the lobby. For some reason, a certain title leapt out at me: “Fat, Forty, and Fired” by Nigel Marsh.

I have purchased hundreds of books and checked out hundreds (maybe thousands) from the library over the years. I have been given books that were hand-selected by intelligent and well-meaning people. I have had books assigned to me by well-educated and researched professionals who were sure that the assigned book was exactly right. Google, Amazon, Borders, and InformIT.com have spent billions on the technology to suggest the perfect book for me. What a waste of time, effort, and money by all of us.

I cannot understand why, but the most memorable, impressionable, and important books in my life have almost all been discovered by a random chance encounter. The predictability of this occurring is slightly higher for me than the average person because I am a bibliophile and spend so much time perusing book shelves.

I do not pretend to have any statistical skills, but I would guess that the chances of finding an important and memorable book purely by accident would be pretty rare—almost as rare as lightning-strikes and lottery-wins. I guess I am just a lucky guy. I sure hope a publisher stumbles on this and realizes I am an untapped goldmine (publishers can email me at lslobodzian [at-sign] gmail [dot] com.

When I purchased “Fat, Forty, and Fired” I expected it to start by describing a situation similar to my own and end by leading me to some needed wisdom and perhaps a roadmap for my future. However, it sat on my bookshelf for months, untouched. Graduate school, work, family, and laziness all conspired to allow dust to collect on the book (and the many others in my “to-read” pile”.) Finally, the timing was right. I had time to read, and I was open to receive Marsh’s message.

I reference many books a month, in addition to the email, articles, white papers, and pages of technical manuals I read on a daily basis. However, I rarely read a book cover-to-cover. If I make the effort to stick with a book, it is the highest praise I can pay the author. For my own sake, and I hope some of you as well, I should take the time now to highlight why I think this book was worth sticking through.

First, I must point out how dissimilar I am to the author. Nigel Marsh is an ad executive and CEO. He is well-traveled, has many influential and wealthy friends, and has made more money in a single year than I have in a decade, I am sure. He was born in England and lives now in Australia. In many ways, he lives in a world that I cannot relate to and suspect that he doesn’t truly know anything about the world I live in. Also, I am not quite forty yet.

On the other hand, he is quite down-to-earth and as I read him I felt like we were not that far apart. He wasn’t born rich and he has to work hard to maintain his lifestyle-it could all be taken from him quickly if he is not vigilante and a little lucky. He is realistic about money, and has faced the possibility of poverty or something near it.

Nigel Marsh strives at being a family man, strives to progress in his professional field, and he strives to make his life meaningful. In the end, that is where Nigel and I meet. He has an interest in Corporate Social Responsibiltiy (CSR), making the world a better place, and raising his kids to be meaningful and productive, as well as happy and healthy.

Nigel opens the book as a guy who wants to be a good family man. He ends up working too much, missing time with the family, and then being either emotionally distant or short-tempered with everyone. I, too, find myself on such a merry-go-round of feeling guilty while working late and missing my family till it hurts, and then getting home to yell and scream and then sit silently in front of a TV. Later, I feel guilty about over-reacting and making children cry and beat myself up inside. Perhaps I make it up to them for a day or two. Eventually, the demands of work initiate the vicious cycle all over again.

We are better Fathers than some men because we at least live with our kids, we make an effort to control and improve ourselves, and we genuinely care whether we are helping or harming our kids. However, good-intentions are not enough with parenting and we both know that. Part of this book is a journey to becoming a better parent.

Nigel is overweight. Pudgy. Out-of-shape. Me too. He has a life-long love of running and generally being active, and wished he were doing more for his health and appearance. Me too. Nigel finds that the time-demands and stresses of work and family make exercise almost impossible. Me too. Nigel’s book is partially a story of inspiration and how-to for the overweight has-beens who aren’t ready to give up yet.

Nigel is a goal-junkie. Me too. We both love to set goals and achieve them, big and small. In fact, goal-setting is our modus-operandi. We both have difficulty understanding how people can continue on for entire lifetimes with few, if any, goals set or achieved. Working on our goals gets us out of bed, gets us through hour after hour, and in our darkest moments prevents us from doing rash and regrettable things. Goals gives us a steady supply of hope, and we are keeping a tight lock on Pandora’s box.

The biggest surprise in the book is that Nigel is an Alcoholic. Me too. He doesn’t reveal this until the middle of the book, and I didn’t see it coming. His alcoholism is probably the greatest contributing factor to my reading the book all the way through, though it is only occasionally mentioned. His experience and struggles with sobriety were reaffirming for me. I will use his example and wisdom to continue to build my sobriety.

At page one, we find Nigel in the darkest days of his life: he has continuing issues in his family that are caused by him, his employer is closing the doors, he is overweight, getting too old to start over at anything (in some people’s minds,) and has an un-addressed drinking problem.

Marsh is apparently well-read, as he has sprinkled his book with quotes and concepts from all over the literary map. History, philosophy, science, theology, and general culture are all represented as he makes a point or draws a big picture. As an example, he quotes an idea from Steven Biddulph’s book Manhood where the argument is made that every man should be required to take his fortieth year off. This would force some reappraisals, rediscoveries, new discoveries, and perhaps change life for the better.

I love this idea. I have always loved the notion of the sabbatical. While I was growing up, I would hear of Priests and Teachers I knew taking a year-long sabbatical after ten years of work, and I have often fantasized about doing the same thing in my own career “someday”. Like many teachers and clergy, I would use that time primarily to further my education. I would also take a trip of a lifetime with the words “adventure” and “exotic” being the key concepts. And I would spend time developing a skill such as playing a musical instrument, painting, writing, or learning a language. Best of all, I would find as many opportunities as possible to include my family and friends in these activities to enrich the experience and the relationship.

Nigel gets laid-off and instead of job-hunting, he decides to take a year off to fix his personal life. He sells his large home and moves to a smaller one. He trims his expenditures and simplifies his life. He takes on responsibilities around the house that he had avoided, such as bathing the kids and taking them to school. He writes and draws. He admits to his alcoholism, quits for good, and attends AA. He learns a lot along the way, and makes it laugh-out-loud funny.

Another major connection I have to Nigel is his goal of a long swim, the Bondi-to-Bronte beach swim (akin to a nautical marathon) in Sydney, Australia where he lives. Nigel is not a strong swimmer or very experienced in the open sea, and as I mentioned before, he is waaaay out of shape. But he sets this goal and starts chipping away at it. At first he can barely swim the length of the pool, but he takes us through an inspiring story of tenacity and ignorance that pays off, but with an unexpected twist that I won’t spoil.

The connection is that I have set the goal of running a marathon this year. October 2008, the Waddell and Reed Kansas City Marathon. I have set the smaller goal of finishing a few 5k’s this summer. I was well on my way last November when I severely-sprained my ankle and was unable to train at all for a few months. Of course, there is the laziness, the overworked, the family-life, and the pain factors that have been excuses for a lack of training. As it stands, I can barely run 3 miles without stopping. But Nigel’s book has fueled my motivation and helped me visualize the attainment of my goal.

The most important tidbit that Nigel provided was how he would set out a running course, and he would walk when he couldn’t jog. He urged himself on by setting small goals along the way, such as, “Run from here to that tree, then walk.” I took away from that the revolutionary concept that it is okay to walk part of the course. In the Marine Corps, it was drilled into me that if I was going to walk instead of run, then I might as well hand over my undeserved male-genetalia and then find someplace to curl up and die. When you are 20 years-old, in fighting shape, and training for combat, that is probably true. When you are 34 with two kids, a stalled career, in the midst of a demanding Graduate program, and 50 pounds heavier than you were at 20 (some of that is additional muscle, right?) then it is okay to walk a little. The point is getting off my gluteus maximus and putting it in motion. After a few months of walk-jogs, Nigel was up to full runs like he used to do, and his body began to show results. I expect the same results. Walk-jog may be embarrassing and humbling, but it is better than sit-and-click (which always leads me to crunch-and-munch.),

Fat, Forty, and Fired is a raucously funny book. There are many times that I laughed out loud, and I rarely do that when I read even if the material is humorous. Marsh has that British humor that I love so much, though I can’t describe it well. He reminds me of Mil Millington, author of the internet classic “Things My Girlfriend and I have Argued About”. The book is not only funny, it is inspiring on many levels—for fathers, for professionals, for men in general, for husbands, for fatso’s, for alcoholics, and for workaholics. To top it all off, there is a payoff for the business community as well.

If I was qualified to make such a remark, I would say that this is one of the most important business books ever written. Nigel has been the CEO of two different agencies. His insight on how to cope with work and life is an important issue to address.

Of course, work/life balance does show up on a 10K report, and it doesn’t result in the kinds of lawsuit and publicity that ethics and security garner lately. Therefore, it is rarely addressed. However, were it to be prioritized and more successfully approached, we could all predict the profits and cost-savings that we would reap from the higher morale and reductions in turnover, burnouts, and health-problems. For instance, any temporary losses in productivity from allowing an employee to coach a team or attend a kindergarten musical would be dwarfed by the cost-savings in health-insurance premiums over the long-term if we assume that family neglect leads to self neglect, resulting in cardio-vascular deterioration over a short career.

Marsh quotes Biddulph as saying: “Our marriages fail, our kids hate us, we die of stress, and on the way out we destroy the world.” At first glance that may seem over-exaggerated, but I don’t think it is far off the mark. Surely, there is a better way to conduct capitalism. I think that Nigel Marsh points us in the right direction.

Marsh quotes Daniel Petra, former CEO of Microsoft in Australia, as reported in the Sydney Morning Herald regarding the life of a CEO: “They have no friends other than work; they have no relationship with their spouse; their kids don’t care about them; they have no hobbies. They lead very insular, single-dimension lives and they don’t have the courage to admit it.” I’ll bet you could apply that on some level to many other professionals. It certainly helps to define the standard of a professional lifestyle to avoid.

Very little of the book offers insight in how to conduct business, but the few paragraphs that apply are absolutely timely and important. The most important lesson that Nigel Marsh teaches us, from his experience as a CEO, is that his position carries with it some responsibility to his employees. All too often, a CEO is overwhelmed by the responsibility to shareholders, analysts, regulators, and the press. Little thought is given to what their roles as senior employee and leader means to the people who make the company work. Marsh offers that a CEO’s primary role is “providing meaning.” He elaborates by saying, “I believe a CEO’s primary responsibility is providing meaningful employment. That doesn’t mean he or she doesn’t have to make the numbers or make difficult decisions. It means he or she has to provide a point for the employees.”

Early in the book, he made a similar point when he said, “I don’t care what they teach you at business school; I view the primary role of any CEO as providing meaningful employment, not taking it away. Any idiot can cut costs; it’s building something valuable (in all senses of the word) that’s the real challenge.” (Added emphasis is mine.) I have long held this belief, and I am glad to see a business leader say it. Finally, there is evidence of intelligent life at the top.

The business guru Jim Collins in Good to Great used the analogy of an organization as a bus. If someone is in the wrong seat on that bus and not contributing, you may consider having that person switch seats on the bus, rather than throwing them off the bus. Of course, discipline problems and ethical issues need to be thrown off the bus. However, if the issue is competency or motivation, you may discover that the employee was forced into that seat and would gladly perk up or contribute more meaningfully from a different seat.

To couple this concept with Nigel’s statement, I think that CEO’s are just playing a numbers game through quarterly lay-offs that is more expensive over the long-term (and more damaging to our economy, which the CEO and shareholders depend on to make a profit.) Rather than a lay-off, a corporation would be better served to redeploy the unproductive employees into a new endeavor (move their seat on the bus.)

The stock price takes a hit in this case, due to the continued expenditure of salaries and benefits. However, those layoffs usually result in a large severance payment to each employee that doesn’t return any value to the stock price, and if your business grows again in the future (as your shareholders expect it to) then you will incur the expense of hiring similar people whom you laid-off previously. In case of two local companies I know personally, the same employee is often hired twice or more over the years by the same company. Perhaps my math is off, but if we could avoid the expense of severance and rehiring, and simultaneously gain some profit or research by redeploying them, wouldn’t we beat our competition while boosting our image, satisfaction, and contribution to GDP/GNP?

Thank you, Nigel Marsh, for a funny, inspiring, and wise book. I discovered it by accident and purchased it second-hand for $6, but it has become one of the most valuable books I own and is added to the short list of great books to re-read.

Update, Blog, Book

I am up to my eyeballs here. My job is maxing out my day, and school is maxing out my night. I am working on my MBA, and adding a concentration in Information Technology; hence, I am taking two accelerated graduate courses right now, both of which have to cram an entire semester into 6 weeks. I have to read several hundred pages a week and write upto to twenty pages or so, not to mention research, write presentations, and try to ponder the lessons. Amazingly, I think I am actually absorbing most of the material. Ask me again in six weeks though.

I am not complaining or bragging, I am just explaining why I can't write regularly on this blog. I am taking a small break from graduate studies through April and May, but that is only because I have projects at work scheduled that take me out of town or late into the night.

As I have stated in the past, I do not want this to be a "me too" blog that says nothing and simply wastes electrons. Even if I am not a profound or skilled writier, I want to make it apparent that I am striving for excellence and this blog can serve as an example of better blogging--eventually. Since I have not achieved that end yet and will not in the near future, I wish to point to someone else's blog that does.

Guy Kawasaki has a cool name. Anyone with a cool name can get my endorsement, unless they abuse children or are fans of the St. Louis Cardinals. Guy Kawasaki is more than a cool name, he is a great blogger. He is original, inspirational, and full of positive energy. I am reading his archive right now and loving every minute of it. The title says it all: How to Change the World.

Finally, the greatest book ever: I love to read and have an extensive library. I would be considered "well-read" by most people, I think. However, over the last few years I have had little choice about what I read due to school and work. Therefore, when I read for fun it has to be short and sweet, and either richly entertaining (belly-laughter) or deeply profound. While browsing for a book that I will need at work, I accidentally ran into the world's greatest book.

[sound of screeching tires...] Allow me to digress for a quick second. Why is it that all of my favorite books were stumbled onto accidentally? You will remember recently that I was floored by the philosophies of The Secret and Thank You Power, both of which I stumbled onto accidentally. One of my favorite novels is The Confessions of Max Tivoli which I stumbled onto by accident at the library while looking for something by Hemingway. "Max Tivoli" was written by Andrew Sean Greer, and "G" is near "H", and the word "Confessions" lept out at me.

Come to think of it, I have no idea how I stumbled on Guy Kawasaki's blog and it has become my favorite thing to read online. The lesson I take away is that despite my best efforts, the best things in my life are accidents. What do I do with this lesson? I have no idea, but perhaps my wife and I should review our birth control method.

[gravel flys, and this short-bus is back on the road...] Anyhow, I accidentally discovered a great book. Then, I accidentally carried it to the register, accidentally dropped my debit card on the counter with my Borders Reward card, and was forced to take it home with me. The book is Geary's Guide To The World's Greatest Aphorists by James Geary. It is educational, biographical, deeply profound, and occasionally so funny that my laughter endangers the book.

If all you have time for is 30 seconds to read and ponder, you can pick up this book, flip to any page, and be assured to find a sentence or two that speaks to you. You can re-read a page many times and, as your mood and experience changes, you will find a different sentence pops out. Conversely, the same pithy quote may take on a different meaning each time you return to it. This is the book that keeps on giving.

Perhaps I will share a little nugget occasionally when I need to blog and don't have time to really dig in. Here are two aphorisms from the book that I like:

"The course of every intellectual, if he pursue his journey long and unflinchingly enough, ends in the obvious, from which the non-intellectuals have never stirred." -Alduos Huxley

"Laziness is just the habit of resting before you get tired" -Jules Renard

Corporal Jason L. Dunham, USMC

Back in 2004, my dad clipped an article out of the Wall Street Journal that he thought I would find interesting. It was the story of a Marine who had a theory: there may be a way to jump on a grenade and not only save other Marine's lives but also perhaps retain your own life. That Marine was then presented with an opportunity to test his theory in combat with lives on the line.

Normally, a grenade explodes and sprays metal (shrapnel) in every direction, effectively killing everything within 15 meters. If you are inside of that 15-meter kill zone, you may have your life saved if you wear body armor made of Kevlar or can take cover behind something armored.

It is well established that if a human body lays on the grenade at detonation, that body will absorb most of the blast and contain, deflect, or retard the lethality of the shrapnel. This action is the ultimate sacrifice: knowing that you will die to save your fellow Marines (or sailors, soldiers, police officers, etc...) This action usually results in a post-humous award of the Medal of Honor (MOH) when engaged in battle.

There are many medals and ribbons you can earn in the military. None of them rank as high as the MOH. Normally, enlisted personnel with the rank of Private through Sergeant Major do not rate a sulte from anybody; that is an honor reserved for Officers who are warranted or commissioned. However, anyone who wears the MOH rates a salute according to tradition. According to this tradition, if the lowest ranking private wearing an MOH were to be approached by the highest ranking General, they would salute each other out of mutual respect.

Some medals and ribbons have a reputation of being given away easily, more for political reasons than heroism. The MOH has never been accused of such. Most people who are awarded the MOH had to die in the process; the act of sacrificing one's life to save many others is a hallmark of MOH awards. In addition, refusing medical treatment while continuing the fight, or performing superhuman acts that turn the tide of battle, are common on MOH citations.

p>

Corporal Jason L. Dunham was a squad leader with Kilo Company, 3rd Battalion, 7th Marines in 2004. He extended his enlistment contract in order to make his second deployment to Iraq with his unit, demonstrating his devotion to his fellow Marines. On April 14, 2004, Cpl. Dunham's squad was engaged in operations in Iraq. While enroute to support his battalion commander's convoy, which had been ambushed, he came upon a group of Iraqi vehicles. He and his squad began to stop and search the vehicles. One of the insurgents rolled a grenade nonchalantly, to avoid it being noticed. Cpl. Dunham saw it and, thinking quickly, threw his helmet and himself on the grenade to shield the balst from two nearby Marines.

Cpl. Dunham was issued his helmet to protect him from shrapnel and other projectiles. I wore a similiar helmet and held similiar conversations regarding its usefulness when I served back in the early 1990's. Luckily, my peers and I never had to test any of our theories. We knew that it was not bullet-proof; we also knew that projectiles do funny things when they detonate and it is impossible to predict what trajectory a projectile may take.

There is a common story of a Marine who was shot while wearing a kevlar helmet: the bullet entered one side, followed the interior of the helmet for some reason, and exited on the other side. You can try to explain it with nano-physics or you can blame it on guardian angels. The fact is that any effort you can take to contain or deflect a projectile is worth the effort.

There was no reason to believe that his helmet would contain the blast and save his life--or anyone else's life. One tiny projectile could find an opening or soft-spot and prove to be fatal. When Cpl. Dunham threw his helmet and himself on the grenade, I am sure that the only thing important to him was to save his squad members. I did not know Cpl. Dunham, but I have known men like him. They may be rare to find in the civilian world but they are fairly common among Marines.

This act of bravery was simply the final and most heroic act in a short but accomplished life. He was respected and loved for many character traits and accomplishments. Therefore, though this act was his final one, it was not out of character. According to everyone who knew him, Jason Dunham was not the kind of guy who stepped up occasionally when people were watching; he lived a life of service, heroism, and accomplishment every day.

We lost more than a Marine when we lost Jason Dunham; we lost potential. America's future, bright though it may be, is a little poorer without Jason Dunham. Who knows what else Jason had to offer this world. On the other hand, his example and the spirit he left behind will inspire many in current and future generations.

Cpl. Dunham's family and friends have established a memorial in his honor, to include a Scholarship fund. I believe in this scholarship fund, which is awarded to Marines and FMF Corpsman who "...demonstrate the core values of leadership, service, sacrifice, and a sense of other(s) that were the characteristics of Corporal Jason L. Dunham." (Quoted from the scholarship website.) I believe that this scholarship will encourage other men and women in our armed forces to act with integrity and honor, courage and conviction. For those of us who are donors rather than applicants, it is a reminder to us of what makes a person rise above the common character and inspire others to give more than they receive. The scholarship promotes the traits that make our nation great, and it elevates the people who aspire to such greatness.

I am not really known for quoting the bible, but I believe that there is a verse that applies here and means more than words can fully describe: "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:12-14 NIV) There is also a great quote that speaks volumes from one of Cpl. Dunham's leaders, on the Memorial website: "All that we have, has been given to us. What we do with what has been given is how we honor those who gave." (Kilo 3 Bravo Gunnery Sergeant Adam Walker)

It is difficult to argue with the importance of education, and how giving money to a scholarship fund is an investment in the future of our society. There are many worthy scholarships and other charities, but today I want to highlight The Jason L. Dunham Memorial Scholarship Foundation. They are still in the process of earning 501(c)3 status, so a donation is not yet eligible for IRS deductions. I am taking a chance that any money I donate this year will be eligible for deduction by the end of the year. Failing that, the cause outweighs my need for a deduction. What I really need is a nation full of Jason Dunham's, or at least more people who aspire to his example of leadership, service, sacrifice, and a sense of others.

If you can fit it into your giving budget, please consider sending a donation to establish The Corporal Jason L. Dunham Scholarship Foundation.

Checks payable to: CPL Jason L. Dunham Scholarship Mailing address: Corporal Jason L. Dunham Memorial Scholarship Foundation Inc. 187 Pinehurst Avenue Suite 1-B New York, New York 10033

Here are a few interesting links for more information:

Corporal Dunham's Memorial and information on his scholarship.

Corporal Jason L.Dunham's Medal Of Honor Citation.

A fantastic short film from MarineTV that describes who Jason Dunham was, in the words of the people who knew him:

A video of President Bush Awarding Cpl. Jason Dunham's family with the Medal Of Honor:

Selfish Charity

How has your 2008 been so far? Mine has been busy. Not the good kind of busy, but the kind of busy that makes you wonder if 2008 is going to be worth the effort. The kind of busy that makes you wish it was 2009 already. Several other people I know have had the same complaint. Isn't the recession and the political primary season enough pain, do I really have to work hard on top of all that?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today I would like to discuss charity. This is something that I have been considering for a while, and I have found an interesting way to give that you should be aware of. Charity is our way of improving our community. It not only makes the world a little better, it makes you better as well. By giving money away, you help mold a generous spirit within you that others will find attractive. Charity also communicates to the universe that you can be trusted with money, and that you are ready for more.

I was once a stingy person. I felt that I was already giving enough through my taxes, and that I didn't need to be charitable when I was just a few paychecks away from poverty. If I was really creative, I would rationalize that instead of being charitable, I can invest in myself and ensure that I have more to give in the future. I was selfish; I was only looking to benefit myself. I still am, but I have found I can benefit myself through charity.

Many lessons and examples along the way have lead me away from stingy thinking. Of course, I have more money today than I did a few years ago. However, I am nowhere near any of my financial goals. Every penny I give away today is money that could have sent my kids to school, helped me get through retirement, or at least paid off my mortgage. It is also money that I have worked hard to earn and have every right to spend on a vacation or a new car.

I am happy to be charitable. By pooling my money with others, I am improving the world around me and raising the standard of living for people less fortunate than me. The key to my transformation from stingy to charity was the acceptance that I am fortunate. I may not be as fortunate as some people I run into, but I do not have to travel far to find people with less love, opportunity, and possessions than myself. Realizing my fortune has allowed me to share it with those around me.

Even though I am grateful for my good fortune, I am still a selfish person. I can't help. Maybe I am less selfish than I was, but I cannot stop looking our for number one. That's okay, though. There is such a thing as Selfish Charity.

Charity also allows me to share my passion, interests, and personality--like this blog. I think that most of us enjoy anything that strokes our ego. When someone asks you about your job, kids, or hobby and seem interested in your answer, that can be like a drug. Expressing your personal interests through bumper-stickers, t-shirts, email-signatures, and well-placed comments in conversation are as natural as breathing. With charity, you express your passion with your most valued object: your money. Giving to a cause that supports your passion feels great; it feels even better when it gives you an opportunity to talk to someone about why you give and why you feel passionate about the subject.

I am passionate about education. I can see that missing educational opportunities has affected me personally and financially. I can also see how my studies have both expanded the quality of my life and my earning potential. When I look around me, I see the same principal at work in the lives of those around me. Therefore, I think that any charity that raises the quality of education or increases educational opportunities for people is worthy of my money.

I am also passionate about children. If you want to prevent a societal ill, you start with children. If you want to improve the potential of a society, you start with children. If you want to laugh or feel energized, spend some time with kids. If you want a fresh perspective on an issue, ask a child. Therefore, almost any opportunity that will benefit children is a worthy cause.

This has led me to be charitable to my local library. The library has provided me with a collection of jazz CDs to import to my iTunes, it had provided me with a collection of audiobooks for my long drives throughout the midwest, and it has answered every question I ever posed there. Moreover, it is a constant source of education and entertainment for my kids through borrowed books and videos. Charitable giving to my library can be seen as a very selfish act since I get so much use from the library.

However, it is not entirely selfish. My local library branch is always full of people who I would not normally run into: people too poor to afford a computer so they go to the library to get online. There are also people taking classes ESL and GED classes to improve their earning potential--and their internal lives. There are programs for children in every age-group and demographic. The library doesn't just make people smarter, it makes them feel better and provides tangible benefits.

I get frustrated when I try to communicate with someone in Kansas who cannot speak English. The library not only improves that person's earning potential and quality-of-life, it lowers my potential for communication breakdown. The library raises the earning potential of those around me, which directly improves the economy, lowers crime, and makes for a more pleasant society. The library teaches people to use computers, which means I will have more computers, servers, and routers to sell, install, and support over time. The library also teaches people to help themselves, to seek information, and to indulge curiosity--those benefits may be intangible, but they improve society all the same.

I have also given to Hospice in memory of people who passed away. Some may think that Hospice is the least likely source of selfish-charity. I once thought that it was tacky to beg for Hospice donations during a funeral. "Don't give flowers, give money to Hospice." I wish I could remember who it was that changed my perspective, but it was so simple: they made me realize that I may need Hospice some day. Or, God forbid, someone I really love.

In that event, I will want Hospice to be well-funded and able to meet every need. When I thought about how I could benefit from Hospice, I realized how important it really is. Now, I feel good giving to Hospice knowing that it helps a family transition during the most painful time of their life. I also know that if I should ever need it, Hospice will be there for me, too.

Charitable giving to political campaigns and committees is more transparently selfish, but it is important nonetheless. It is not enough to vote nowadays, unfortunately. Campaigns are media-driven and very expensive. If you believe in a cause, you can improve its chances of being heard, presented intelligently, and being accepted if you provide funding. It doesn't matter how rational your cause is or how much evidence you have to support it; if your cause is underfunded it will be drowned out by ignorant causes run by evil people with more money. That is a fact, whether you are a Democrat or Republican. By the way, is there a charitable cause that brings the two parties closer together? I will pledge my vacation fund for that cause.

Ayn Rand tried to teach us that there is nothing wrong with being selfish; in fact, it is unavoidable. Perhaps her philosophy went too far and ignored many important factors, but the essence is true: Being selfish is not inherently evil and can make the world a better place.

There is an episode of the TV show "Friends" where the hippy-ish character Phoebe tries to prove that unselfish acts exist. She found that everytime she tried to be unselfish, she benefitted in some way--despite her best efforts to avoid personal benefits. It is hard to develop a character over 30 minutes once a week, with commercial breaks, but I inferred that she embraced her selfish charity and used her selfishness to improve the lives of others.

If you are already charitable, then I thank you. Moreover, I encourage you to pimp your favorite charitable cause in the comments below! If you are not already charitable, I hope that you begin to consider ways that you can benefit yourself through charity. If nothing else, do it to lower your taxes.

Art: More of it Please!

What is art? Is it important?If not, why not? If so, why is it so?

I started thinking about art and realized that it may be one of the most effective means of achieving progress. As I considered, I came to the belief that increasing the expression and appreciation of art can improve a person, a business, a government, or a society. The neglect of art has been the kiss of death in every instance. Art is the secret ingredient to life.

These are philosophical questions that have been raised and pondered thousands of times over thousands of years. I think every culture should ask these questions. Every organization and grouping of people should ask these questions. Every individual should question the nature, quality, and value of art for themselves. The old answers and methods are useful guides, but they are not useful answers. Only your own answer is useful to you.

In some ways, it is impossible to avoid these questions. If you accept the fact that movies, books, and music are art (if not, what are they?), then you must know what you like. You can answer whether you appreciate rap music, romantic comedies, reality TV, and mystery fiction. You can look at a painting and tell me if you would hang it in your house, and if so, which room it would go in. Your answers to preferences are based on your own pnderings, even if they are shallow or subconscious.

A deeper, conscious, and perhaps even documented approach to your own answers about the philosophy of art will allow you to appreciate it on new levels. You will begin to learn more about yourself, you will refine your approach to life, and you will develop or expand your own artistic expression.

I think one of the biggest things that is lacking in our society is a deliberate attempt at expecting, appreciating, and expressing art in every facet of our life. To seek artistic expression in business would improve our society on many levels. To seek more ways to combine art with science would make science more beautiful and art more relevant. Religion was once the primary source of inspiration for artists; if more religious people sought to express themselves through high-quality and deeply-considered artistic expressions we would have more beautiful and relevant forms of art and religion.

I think art is characterized by creation. When you really aim for artistic expression and give it all of your thought, emotion, and effort, you create something new. New is not always good and it is not always bad, but it is always required in order to improve anything. To put it another way, you will never achieve any goal you set without some level of creativity. Individuals, groups, and societies are all dependent on some level of creativity to achieve, grow, or progress. That creativity is enabled and enhanced by art.

Humans are slow in comparison to other living things. In fact, there are few animals that couldn't catch us if we were limited to our own feet and muscles. We have very limited senses; most animals, bugs, birds, and fish have senses that we can only dream about. We are weak when it comes to most animals, especially if you compare our strength to our body size. Elephants are stronger than us in every way, ants are stronger based on a ratio of body size to carrying capacity.

Even so, we have one advantage over every living thing: we are creative. Even though we cannot see as well naturally, we have developed ways of seeing our world that no other living thing can see. Despite our limited mobility and lack of swimming or flying capacity, we have created vehicles that exceed the limits of every other living thing. Our creativity has allowed us to travel to places that cannot support life without our creativity. In many ways, our creativity has exceeded the capabilities of natural life. Our creativity has the potential to allow us to create life on our terms and perhaps achieve immortality or timelessness.

The creativity that allows us to rise to the top of the living world despite our shortcomings is based on scientific technology. However, science alone is simply a matter of explanation and experimentation. Science allows us to discover and explain the details of our world, but science does not create anything new without art.

In order for Einstein to create the equations that explain the speed of light and predict the effects of energy consumption in impossible-to-achieve conditions, he needed to think artistically. By attempting to think in ways that no one else had previously done, and expressing new ideas in a meaningful way, Einstein required qualities that are true of artists rather than scientists. A scientist understands fundamental theories and mathematical methods, but artists see the unseen and venture into the unknown.

Music and paintings were once devoted to religion. Huge Buddhas, ornate Mosques, and paintings of biblical scenes are studied thousands of years after they were created by atheists, skeptics, or adherents of other religions. Even though I am not a Muslim, I can appreciate the mosaics of the Arab world. On the other hand, the ugliest religious men ever--the Taliban--banned art in every form and destroyed one of the most important and awe-inspiring works of art in the world.

Art can make religion inspiring and beautiful. I think our current state of religion (in almost every form) is focused more on theology, armumentation, competition, and defense. The religious art that exists is rarely as inspired and fresh as it once was. I see many artists imitating or copying other artists and produciing art that is vanilla and predictable. Perhaps I am missing it, but I am not seeing religious art that breaks new ground and sees new perspectives like Michaelangelo and Bach.

In the history of western civilization, there are two key periods to understand: the dark ages and the renaissance. Both of those periods are defined by the value they placed on art. In both instances, the quality of the average person's life was relative to the value placed on artistic expression. Art is a key factor in raising or threatening the quality of a person's life. For example, compare the standard of living in Turkey and Afghanistan. There are so many similarities between their history, culture, religion, and geography. Even so, the standard of living and level of artistic expression are both high in Turkey while they are extremely low in Afghanistan. That is not a coincidence, nor is it an isolated example. It is a constant throughout history in every region and culture: Art is required for life to have substance, quality, and meaning.

Art can be an expression of beauty. In your house, if you have a wall, floor, or object that is boring, shabby, or even ugly, you can immediate change the feeling of the entire room with a simple and beautiful piece of art. Take a windowless, gray basement and add a woven rug and a mural--now it is a comfortable place to spend time. Take a plain, white refrigerator and add a 1st-grader's work of art, you immediately brighten the whole kitchen. Studies have shown that adding art to the workplace can measurably boost creativity and morale (if other factors are in place such as management, market, and salary.)

Sometimes art is required to express an emotion, and the result is not beautiful. Art can be used to inspire guilt, fear, outrage, patriotism, shame, motivation, focus, or humility/awe. The key is expression and communication. Our words can be spoken or written in any volume or size and still find themselves ineffective at communicating a message fully. However, art is always an effective method to communicate a message or emphasize our words. The next time you drive down a road, compare your own reaction to signs of only text (Street signs, etc...) to signs that include pictures (Cautionary road signs or advertisements.) McDonalds has found that a picture of a Big Mac has a greater effect on their sales than any slogan or logo.

In that same vein of communication, it is sometimes necessary to use art to provide perspective. I can explain the solar system's structure a million times to you, but you may never understand it until I show you a picture of it. The perspective of a bird's-eye view can be all it takes to understand complex concepts. Perhaps such a picture would have been useful to Galileo as he argued against the church in favor of heliocentrism.

As previously mentioned in one example, art improves business. Art is not automatically profitable, but neither are other business concentrations. Businesses have failed that were based on creating new art, such as record companies and graphic design firms. However, businesses have also failed because they were so focused on the bottom line or financial gimmicks that they forgot to be creative and attractive. In my mind, the best way to illustrate the value of art in business is to look at the auto industry: beautiful and creative cars will make money of they are also marketed and manufactured intelligently. Ugly cars without creative features, like the "Yugo", will have a rough time in the market no matter how carefully they are managed.

With the word "art" many people immediately think of paintings, music, or poetry. I think that definition is too narrow to define art, and it is counterproductive. In fact, any attempt to define art threatens to limit its impact on our world. The looser we allow art to be defined, the broader we are able to consider our artistic expression and make it relevant and beneficial.

The point I want to make here is that art should always be bigger than our imagination, which allows our imagination to grow. Art is a product of our imagination. It is also a source of fuel and fertilizer for imagination. Without art and imagination, we would not have cars, computers, or even peace and prosperity.

It takes an artistic and imaginative mind to find a way to end war or to expect a life that is devoid of violence. I expect to spend every day of my life without hearing a gun-shot, without having to kill another person, or having to bury a person I love who was killed by violence. It is easy for me to think in such a way because it is a life I have always known. It will require imagination for people in Darfur, Iraq, or Afghanistan to envision a life without violence; artistic expression will enable people to expect peace and seek its implementation.

A look at recent history will demonstrate the power of art for good or evil. In Nazi Germany, Soviet Russia, and China's Cultural Revolution, all expressions of art were hijacked by the government and used to control the populace. Expressions of art were used by the baby-boomer generation to change our perspectives of war, race, and gender. Art is heavily used in marketing to increase sales; some people watch the Super Bowl just to see how artistic the commercials will be.

The term "craftsman" is used less frequently today than it was in the past, and is often misused. A craftsman was once a person who no only performed a task but did so artfully. They didn't just make a table, they made an object that was as beautiful as it was useful. We tend not to buy tables from craftsman anymore; we expect our tables to be cheaper and settle for simple or common tables that are mass produced on machines. An artist may be used to design the table, but after the 10,000th copy rolls off the line is it really a work of art?

I like having affordable products available to me, but I do not like the fact that mass production is more valuable than craftsmanship. It is a real loss that in place of craftsman today, we have machines that are incapable of creation, or low-wage employees that are neither empowered nor inspired to be creative. We are beginning to imitate the futuristic visions of artists such as George Orwell, Alduous Huxley, and Roger Waters. Even though we can find items that are pleasing to the eye and fulfill the functions they were intended for, it is rare to find consumer goods that contain craftsmanship, creativity. originality, or true beauty. Mediocrity seems to be the expected and accepted standard.

We need to think more about art. The same old ways of looking at business, science, religion, and life should be refreshed, enhanced, or replaced by new perspectives and ideas. By infusing artistic expression into our daily lives, in everything we do from cooking to dressing to working, we add to our pleasure. Art can be fun. It can be healing and refreshing. It can wake us up from mediocrity and monotony.

Art allows us to experience more of life. If you watch a movie and only understand half of the jokes, then you only enjoyed half of the potential that the movie offered. How much more would you enjoy that same movie if you understood all the jokes, assuming all the jokes were funny? As Shrek might say, life is like an onion; it has layers. As you peel each layer back, you find another layer that was once concealed to you. Through art, we discover perspectives and sensations that were once concealed to us.

If you have read this blog for any length of time, you should expect a mention of my favorite subject, Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR). I think that it takes the same area of our brain that creates and appreciates art to appreciate and implement CSR. Like art, CSR can open up the perspective of a business and its people, increase morale, expose and enhance beauty, and stimulate creativity. By looking for ways to be profitable while acting responsibly with everyone affected by your operation, you consider more solutions to business problems, some of which may be better than the solutions you would have considered without CSR.

By using art to create beauty, inspire emotions, and provide perspective, an artist makes his and her world a better place to live. Like karma, by sending out their art they receive a better world to live in. If a business uses CSR and attempts to express the qualities and attributes of art, they too will improve their world. They will find that their market responds to them in new ways, that their competitors become more civil, that their vendors and communities partner with them and root for their success, and that their employees are more effective and less destructive. CSR is not just a method of limiting liability and negative press; CSR can be a method of artistic expression that increases profitability and effectiveness for a business. Moreover, it can make business enjoyable at every level.

Why Be Significant?

I find it funny that as I learn lessons that I can apply to my life to make be a better man, I find that the same principles can be applied to a company to make it better. The self-help strategies found in How to Win Frinds and Influence People, Think and Grow Rich, Thank You Power, and The Secret can be applied to either an individual or a company and achieve the end result of effectiveness. As I work my way now through The Purpose Driven Life I am finding a similiar result.

I will start with myself. Day three of The Purpose Driven Life teaches, among other things, that "Knowing your purpose gives meaning to your life" (page 30.) The author, Rick Warren, goes on to say that by providing meaning, your life gains hope and significance. The word significance stood out to me. That is the word I have been looking for on this "Journey of Spiritual Discovery" that I am on. The end result that I intend for my life can best be defined as significant.

I always ask "Why". If I am told to do something, if the recipe calls for something, at every step in the instruction manual, I have the habit of asking "Why". I think that asking "Why" raises my level of consciousness and allows me to learn lessons that would otherwise be missed. I think that if I ask "Why" as I learn, my learning is more effective and efficient.

The question of "Why" is what lead to my "Journey of Spiritual Discovery". It is the fuel that keeps the journey moving along. As soon as I am no longer curious about "Why", the journey will transform into another pursuit.

To have finally found a word to describe my intention is a big step. Now that I know I want to be significant, I can refine my quest and focus on the lessons and methods that provide the intended result. Further clarification is required, however.

Now I have a new "Why": Why do I want to be significant? As Warren points out, there are bad things that may be driving us: anger, resentment, guilt, etcetera. The best driver, according to Warren, is God. The question for me is: What is driving my desire for significance?

I spent a few minutes Googling "significance" to see if anyone had anything to say about why you should be significant. It seems to me like it it is assumed that if you want to be significant, you should already know why. Or, perhaps it is just assumed that is a fundamental value.

For me, there isn't a point to living an insignificant life. To spend an entire life and achieve nothing (or worse, to leave more damage than creation) is not a life to me. I have known people like that; as far as I know, the only thing they did was tranform oxygen into carbon dioxide. It is as if they never even lived.

Significance is not scalable in my mind. Mother Theresa was significant to millions. My third grade teacher, Mrs. McGlaughlin, was significant to me and perhaps a few hundred. It is the same achievement in my mind. I think that Einstein's mother is just as significant as he is, especially since you cannot have the latter without the former.

Now I can refine my thoughts to "What" and "How". What is significant for me? How can I achieve that significance? The Journey allows me to chart new ground and answer questions that will keep me going when times get tough.

As I think of this for me, I habitually try to apply it to CSR. Can a company be significant? What would make it so? Why should a company seek significance?

Under the tenets of Capitalism, a company's significance is defined by profits. However, what is significant about profits in the grand scheme of things? It seems to me that there is something more significant than profits. Assets and equity are significant too, but I am thinking about people.

When I think about significant companies, I immediately think of companies who have made an impact on the human race in a good way. They developed new technologies that everyone uses, like Microsoft, GE, 3M, and Intel. Significant companies changed how we do business, like IBM, Cisco, and Ford.

The most significant companies are the ones who have provided the most benefit for humanity, in my mind. Significance, for me, is defined by how you affected the quality of other lives, how you inspired and influenced people, what you created, and what you leave for posterity. Profits, assets, and equity are fleeting; they can be eaten up rapidly by poor management or global inflation. However, if you provide education, technology, and inspiration to a third world village, you leave something for posterity. If you start with a polluted wasteland and transform it into a thriving ecosystem, that would be significant.

In capitalism, it all comes down to getting people to spend their money on you, and convincing them to spend more money than the costs you incurred. The most important factor in a customer's buying decision is their perception of the company they are buying from. Therefore, a company that is perceived as significant will be more likely to attract potential customers and achieve profitable sales.

Of course a company needs to be profitable, just as a boat needs to displace rather than absorb water. A company's efforts at research and development are vital to not only maintaining long-term profitability, but also to achieving significance. However, the profitable and innovative company that makes a positive impact on humanity will achieve a level of significance that elevates their market share, propels their share price, motivates their employees, and embraces their community.

Significant companies can not only expect profitability, they can expect to enjoy doing business. So it is with significant people. Life is enjoyable on a whole other level when you know you are doing something significant. As every artist, parent, and craftsman can tell you, there is unexplainable joy from creation that does not fade quickly.

The Meaning of Life

I continue on my journey of spiritual discovery. By the way, that is what I am calling it now. It started with book browsing, and two books attracting my attention: Thank You Power by Deborah Norville and The Secret by Rhonda Byrnes. As I considered those books, I revisisted the book Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, which contains a similiar message to The Secret: that of using your mind to attract desirable things.

The result of these three books was twofold. First, I began to change my innner thought life by thinking less about the negative things that I experience or wish to avoid and thinking more about the positives I gratefully possess or that I desire. Secondly, I began to dig deeper into my heart to figure out what I really want and why I want it, as well as to find gratitude for the great life I have now. The side effect of these ideas were that I was happier, more peaceful, and more focused on my employer and family rather than on myself (which made me even happier, somehow.) I have pruned my life a little, which allows for new growth.

Somehow, in the midst of this "Journey of Spiritual Discovery" (when you read that title, it should have a dramatic echo to it) I stumbled on Rick Warren's name and his book The Purpose Driven Life. I am not sure where it popped up, but what stood out to me was the fact that he was talking about having a mission or purpose to your life, which would made my "Journey of Spiritual Discovery" a lot easier: journeys are easier if you know in which direction to set out. I was also intrigued by his ability to reach people like me who are not in church but also not opposed to church.

One of my Christmas gifts was a giftcard to my favorite store, Half Price Books. I used it to purchase two books, one of which was Rick Warren's The Purpose Driven Life. For the last two mornings, I have read a chapter and contemplated the author's points. Day one taught me that the purpose of my life is about God, not about me. Day two taught me that God had a specific purpose in mind when he created me.

I am not saying I am accepting these lessons and nodding my head in obedience to Rick Warren or to God. Actually, if I was convinced that the God of the universe had specifically commmanded me, I would nod in obedience and spring into action. Therefore, the real challenge for Warren's book is to convince me that God has provided the meaning and purpose. And only God can do that, really. Eloquence is lost on me at this point in my "Journey of Spiritual Discovery" (still hearing the echo?); what I need is action from God that guides me to a conclusion. I cannot be steered by warm-fuzzies or well-crafted C.S. Lewis-like logic. I want results, actions, evidence, and undeniable truth that is as bullet-proof as mathematics.

If anyone knew what all I had seen, heard, done, and had done to me through Christian churches (of many denominations from Catholic to Pentecostal and several points in-between) they would question why I was willing to read Rick Warren's book at all. It isn't a horror story, but it isn't pretty either. The essence is that churches have demonstrated themselves to me to be a place of destructive power at least as often as they help people.

The thing is, I cannot say for a fact that there is no God. From that starting point, I like to think that if there is a God who created everything, then he has communicated with his creation in some way throughout history. Otherwise, the belief in a silent creator is pointless: why have a God who is there but is uninterested in how we live. I would rather believe that there is a Creator, that He had a purpose in mind when He created us, and that He has communicated that purpose to us in ways that we can accurately perceive and interpret individually.

With that creator in mind, I am lead to religion. I figure that if God has spoken in a way that we can accurately perceive and interpret, then people throughout history must have recorded their experiences and can point us in the proper direction. That is where my disillusionment begins. Even if you accept the bible as the word of God, you read a depressing history of people being unable to perceive and interpet the message of God, even in the face of undeniable miracles.

By the way, at the risk of being blasphemous, I feel the need to criticize biblical miracles right now. The biblical mioracles are a major sticking point in my lack of faith. Here is the thing: between 2000 and 4000 years ago, a miracle was a simple matter. If I had a time machine, I could take everyday objects from 2007 A.D. and perform miracles before the crowds that were unimpressed by Moses, Elijah, and Jesus. A lighter, flashlight, aspirin, penicillin, ballpoint pen and notebook paper, or even a mosquito net would be considered items that would change a society. I think God wasted some tremendous miracles on a people who would have been really impressed by the effects of flint, friction, and butane.

Nowadays, it takes more to impress us. We fly, touch the moon, circumnavigate the globe from the comfort of a laptop in a coffee shop, and accurately predict the unstoppable whims of nature. We have methods, theories, equations, scales, and equipment to not only detect the physical laws but to measure them, predict them, and observe their results at the sub-atomic level. If you could do one biblical miracle today and allow it to be tested by scientific theory, you would have a greater effect on the majority of people. Sure, some sceptics would remain. But the vast majority of people who I know, read, or observe would at least start paying attention; the world is ready for a proven miracle, is able to communicate its message worldwide at the speed of thought, and are more than willing to do some good.

Because we lack the unifying morality and values that the miracle could provide, selfishness runs rampant on our planet. It is spreading like wildfire. Old, traditional notions of devotion to family, religion, race, and/or nationality are fading away. This new, flattened world is all about the individual. All around the world, people are throwing off the yoke of belonging to something bigger than themselves. They are embracing the idea that they can have everthing they want, whenever they want it. There are good things to say about this trend, but I think it is mostly bad. Eliminating discrimantion based on gender, race, or ethinicity is good. Abandoning family and neglecting the people who need us (chidren, handicapped, and the elderly) is bad.

Our forefathers (white black, arab, asian, christian, buddhist, muslim...all forefathers, I mean) needed to have unity in their community in order to provide them with a community that kept them safe and provided for their needs while giving them an outlet for their own talent. Now that we have created a global community of more security and free trade, our need for belonging (and conforming) to a larger group is lessened. We seem to seek less miracles and more scientific discovery. We seek less tradition and rules which provide morality and ethics, and we seek more freedom to enjoy life and find out the truth for ourselves.

Even so, we are left adrift. Science and technology has been tremendously effective at improving our existence. However, they have failed to answer our fundamental question of "Why?" Instead, they distract us from the question.

Materialism causes us to pursue wealth and commodities. That pursuit can so consume us that we never stop to ask "why?" Some people amass a houseful of trinkits, collectables, and commodites and at the end of their pursuit they realize that they missed out on so many good things because they were consumed by their pursuit of stuff. They realize, too late, that the stuff was meaningless in the end.

Television, video games, mass-market papaerbacks, and a myriad other forms of entertainment distract us from the "Why" question. In fact, we may be distracted by a movie or book that makes us think we are pursuing the "Why", but we are being led in circles or to dead ends. Other times, we never are aware that the "Why" question exists. The technology magician keeps waving a hand over here and a handkerchief over there, directing our attention away from anything meaningful and producing that shallow, uncomprehending smile from us that he loves so much.

This planet has seen it all before. We don't even see the planes and helicopters in the sky anymore unless they are particularly loud; the ancients from the bible would have had a cartoon-like reaction to such a sight where their jaw hits the ground and their eyes pop out of their heads while an old car horn exclaims "ah-ooo-gah!" We have already imagined it all. We have seen the earth destroyed on TV so many times it bores us. We have seen into the lives of every historical character, rewritten history, and glimpsed the future.

Somhow, we are still easily impressed by triviality. When Paris Hilton burps or Britney Spears runs to the store for eggs, we send an army to film it. We spend millions of dollars to watch people throw and catch a ball, and then bet millions more on the outcome. We bring a multi-billion dollar industry to a screaming halt (and thousands of paying travelers along with it) and forget our political prejudices for a while when airplanes are flown into buldings. We have the ability to be impressed, and it wouldn't really take much--just don't give us the same old-same old.

If some guy showed up today and could demonstrate his inexplicable ability to heal, transform water into wine, or feed thousands with a fish and a loaf, he would be on "You Tube" in a heartbeat. You can actually videotape him walking on water with your cell-phone, immediately upload it to the web, and then start spreading the word. It would clog email servers worldwide within an hour. Scientists would show up and test the density of the water, weigh him, take air-quality samples, and make everyone pee in a specimin jar. Unless there was a known reason why he stood on top of water, science would have to concede that they couldn't explain it. That would distract most people from their meaningless lives. They would start to listen to what the guy said and would be convinced to take action on his message. If his message was as relevant as Jesus', and rang as true on as many levels, then that guy would get a religion named after him.

I cannot get the "Why" question out of my head. I would love to. I have always been willing to just fit into the societal mindset and quit trying to find deeper meaning. I suspect that I would be happier and more peaceful if I could just accept that life is absurd and meaningless, and catch up on all the celebrity gossip and NBA drama.

What keeps me from giving up the quest to find out "Why" is the suspicion that if I could answer the question at least partially or superficially, I would be much happier and more peaceful. In fact, I do have some answers to "Why", though they beg more questions. I am not drifting completely without meaning.

For instance, there is value in being happy. Not "I just finished chocolate cake" happy, but "I just made my daughter smile" happy or "I just accomplished a major goal" happy. Therefore, part of why we are here is to discover the things that produce the most joy and do more of them. Why should we make ourselves happy and why do certain things provide more joy than others? I don't have that answered comepletely yet, but it feels right; I have the impression that it is a truth as fundamental as 1+1=2.

On a personal, individual level, I have a very distinct purpose defined for me by the universe: raise my kids. Not just physically, not just intellectually, but to raise kids with esteem, ethics, morality, confidence, power, grace, humility, and direction. That purpose is temporary; when they become adults I will have a very limited role; I will need another purpose to occupy the rest of my life. It would be best of I have a larger purpose that encompasses my career, my child-rearing, and any other purpose for me. That larger purpose is hazy on the best of days for me, hence my "Journey of Spiritual Discovery".

I was very frustrated and stressed out a few years ago because I could not figure out what I was "supposed" to do with my life. That was based on a notion that I had been created by a specific God who had a specific purpose for me. I was frustrated because I could not determine what that purpose was. If I had been born with a natural ability to play piano, sing, or paint, then my purpose would be clearer. When a man finds himself standing at 7 feet tall, he is forced to consider a basketball career, so if that was me I would have had something to consider. If I had been born into an environment that directed me into a specific purpose, that would have clarified the question. If an Angel in all his shining glory appeared before me and declared my purpose, I would at least have something to go on.

I have nothing like that. I have no talents that stick out and define me. I am average in almost every way. My above-average qualities are more like character traits. My desire to do well, my ability to persevere, think larger than the problem at hand, and connect with people are all geared to many occupations. Basically, I am equipped to do anything I want to do and expect results consistent with my efforts. At the time, I did not see that as an asset and did not enjoy the freedom it implied.

At some point, I read the book What Should I Do With My Life by Po Bronson. My conclusion from that book (and I think it was the author's as well) is that we are free to choose our own purpose. Some people have their purpose defined for them, but in the end they remain free to choose that purpose in the same way that I do. The implication is that without a purpose being handed to me, I had more freedom than those with a clearly defined purpose, who I resented.

Bronson's book helped me release the resentment I felt about not being handed a purpose, and that was a huge weight lifted off me. I embraced the concept that I had been granted freedom to choose my purpose by whatever Gods may or may not be. However, it didn't help me find that purpose. I was free to choose, but choose what?

I have asked myself if I need to have a purpose. I have concluded that yes, I do. If you start a company without a purpose, how can you expect to make a profit? If you start a non-profit NGO without a purpose, you will not receive any donations, be recognized by the IRS, or accomplish anything. In fact, the question is raised: does a non-profit exist without donations, recognition, and accomplishment? I say no, it is nothing without those things at least.

Does a person exist without a purpose? My answer is no. Sure, you occupy space and leave progeny, but did you exist? My concept of existence is based on the fact that we are conscious. Apes take up space and leave progeny, but that is their purpose. They cannot hope for anything better than that.

We can do more than reproduce. Even though our eyes, ears, muscles, lungs, and skeletal structure are far inferior to most animals, we conquer our world through our existence. Our consciousness creates new ideas in how to gather food, build shelter, transport ourselves, fight, communicate, and even reproduce.

The word "create" is what brings me closer to answering the "Why" question. According to the Muslim, Jewish, and Christian traditions, the first thing that God did in our world is create. He created everything we know, ending with Eve (he saved the best for last.) Then, he told us and all the animals to go out and procreate.

For all the animals, birds, fish, bugs, trees, flowers, and the rest of life, that is all they can do. They create new life. They do so with little or no consciousness; I doubt there is much thought involved when a tree drops an acorn or a fish sprays an egg cluster.

We create with our mind and our actions. I created my children in my mind before I was in the same room with my wife. I began creating my children while I was still a child dreaming about what my future may hold. Not only that, but I created this blog. I can create works of art (though only my mother would hang them up proudly), I can think up ways to redirect water or move mounds of earth on a scale that no animal has ever approached. The creativity of the human mind is what makes us exist. We create more than just progeny, we create legacies.

Therefore, I think the larger purpose of life for humans is to create. To say it another way, our purpose is to be creative. We could just make babies, watch TV, and burp Budweiser for 77 years; however, would that be meaningful?

The thing is, many people consider the meaning of life for only a brief moment. They realize it is a hard question to answer; they decide that they can either accept someone else's answer (religion, state, family, company,or other authority) or they can ignore the question. I think that many people realize the fundamental truth that life should include as much happiness as possible, so they seek an easy way to make themselves happy. They find someone to make babies with, buy a TV and a comfortable couch, crack open a Bud, and burp their way to ignorant bliss.

I think they quit too soon and would find that their beer tasted better and TV would be more satisfying if they had a larger view of the answer to the question "Why?" Why are we here and what is the purpose of our life? What provides meaning to our life? Obviously, happiness has something to do with it. However, what is the point of happiness? Moreover, why is happiness so fleating, and why do so few people find it? You probably know a lot of people who say they are happiest on their couch with a remote in one hand and a bag of Doritos in the other, but their expressions and actions tell you how unhappy they really are.

Happiness merely points the way forward. It is the first step in the process of finding meaning, and it is a step that you return to often. I think the deeper meaning of life is creativity. Create something and you will have begun to define your purpose and meaning.

I am left with the question: create what? Create something that makes you happy. Of course, first you need to know what makes you happy. You need to seek deeper levels of happiness. Doritos and Budwiser may provide happiness, but they are low on the scale of potential happiness.

What is your potential happiness? Finding out how deeply you can experience happiness is a great journey in itself; I have found that there is always another layer. What I considered happiness at 20 years old is nothing compared to the deeper levels I am discovering as a father.

Heck, just getting sober expanded my scale of happiness. I am not here to say that alcohol blocks everyone's ability to experience happiness. I will say that you don't know if it is or isn't until you have spent 3 months sober.

However, I will concede that many people are affected by alcohol in the same way that I am by coffee--in other words, some people can achieve total hapiness and enjoy alcohol in the process. In light of that, is it possible that there is something else standing in your way of happiness? I didn't know how happy I could be until I let go of alcohol, some resentments, and some other negativities. I am finding new levels of happiness as I embrace new levels of gratitude and positive thinking. I have no idea how deeply happy I can be, but I aim to find out and remove every obstacle I encounter.

Since this blog is about me, I am going to focus on my purpose. I post this in the sincere hope that someone can read it and take a step towards finding their own purpose in life. I am sure this world would be a better place if more people were seeking some meaning. I am equally sure that people would seek meaning more often if there were more mysteries to our everyday world. Alas, we don't know how our stuff works, but we know it has something to do with oil or electricity, it was conceived by by a human, and most of it was made in China. We know that if we had to explain it, we could Google it or ask our 13-year-old neighbor to explain it.

Back to me: I have a sense on a fundamental level that 1+1 will always equal 2. That sense of a priori knowledge also leads me to believe that I should be happy, that I should do my best to raise my kids, that I should make the world a better place, and that I am meant to create. That is the meaning of my life, at least as far as I have defined it.

I have made the assumption that I can possess a priori knowledge, and that I can sense it. I have assumed that my senses and logic can be trusted in this regard, even though science has consistently demonstrated that our senses can be easily fooled and that our capacity for logic is often flawed and easily influenced. I am betting my life, or at least the meanining of my life, on these assumptions.

Do you have a better idea? Rick Warren thinks he does. He believes that God created each of us for His purpose. Warren bases this assertion on biblical passages, and expects that we will find out what God's purpose is for us by understanding the bible.

I am unconvinced that the bible is the word of God. I am unconvinced that there is a church anywhere in the world that Jesus would be proud of. I am unconvinced that Rick Warren has all the answers, either in his head or in his book. Finally, I am unconvinced that I can find all the answers in one place, book, man, or method.

Conversely, I am unconvinced that Albert Camus and his dreary Existential brothers were right about the absurdity of life. I am unconvinced by Bertrand Russell and other brilliant Atheists who teach that belief in God is illogical. To be succinct, I am fairly sure that there is a God and he had something in mind when he created this universe.

In the first two chapters of The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren has already provided me with an exercise that is good to run through occasionally. I am now considering my place in the universe, the quality of my life, and whether there is an even higher purpose that I can achieve. Even if God and Rick Warren are fake, the act of examing your concept of the universe and your place in it is beneficial.

This examination allows me to see things I would normally overlook. You know, you drive to work everyday past thousands of stationary objects, but I'll bet that you have only seem half of them, or less. You could drive down the same road everyday for 60 years and not realize that there was a tree at a certain spot until that tree falls on your car. So it is with so many things in your life.

My search for the Meaning of Life may never be resolved. I may reach my death bed and conclude it was all meaningless and absurd. I may change my answer several times, or I may be stuck with the same vague answer I have today for the duration. What I think is important to know is that the quest for meaning is more important than the final answer. By seeking to be meaningful, we are able to live a life that is more effective. We will have well-defined and tested values. We will know how to make ourselves happy and maintain that happiness regardless of our condition. We will prune the dead branches and nurture the fruitful ones. We will be left with pride and satisfaction, rather than regret and depression.

I hope that God did create a specific purpose for me, and that Rick Warren can help me discover that purpose. If not, I can take comfort in the fact that the journey is a fun ride, and that the freedom is mine to choose.

The Benefits of Gratitude

I am thankful for Deborah Norville and her book "Thank You Power: Making the Science of Gratitude Work for You". No, I am not aiming to be funny when I say I am thankful for a book on gratitude. I am sincerely thankful that I knew who she was (I remembered her from the local news in Chicago as I was cutting my news-junkie teeth), that my eye is drawn to striking blondes (she gets prettier every year), that I was open to this message, and that the message is relevant to me right now. This book is elevating my level of happiness while it raises my potential prosperity and makes dramatic improvements in my family. For all of that, I am truly thankful.

This blog entry is not a book report. In fact, I don't really need to read the book; I know all I need to know about saying thank you. What Deb's book does for me is awaken forgotten knowledge, and guides my thoughts into channels that help me apply the knowledge I already possess.

My parents taught me gratitude. They forced it down my throat, as all parents do...and should. When I learned to talk, one of the first phrases I had to learn was "thank you". That came right after the word "please". I remember my parents handing me the object of my desire but not releasing it to me until I said "thank you". Soon, I learned to say "thank you" so easily that I could do so without sincerity, I could thank without thought.

Now I can say thanks 1000 times a day. I rarely mean it, but I often say it. When the fast-food employee who visually disgusts me and took too long to fill my order (and probably screwed up the "no onions' and "no ice") hands me a rumpled bag of greasy, overpriced artery-clogging "food", I always say thank you. Why? I am not truly thankful; in fact, if it was up to me that person would be on a diet and in college, the food would be more carefully prepared and lower in fat/sodium/volume, and the price would be lower. I am not thankful for eating fast-food, I do it out of necessity and reluctance. However, I habitually say thanks.

On the other hand, when my wife buys me something at the store, I complain that it is the wrong brand, size, or flavor. I am thankful that she thought of me, but I complain because she did not completely satisfy my desire. That is freakin' stupid. Why in the hell would she want to do anything nice for me if I complain rather than thank. Here I am, slightly thankful for the effort but all I express is ingratitude. I am an idiot.

What a jerk I have been, yet all along I compared myself to really scummy jerks and think that I am a prince in comparison. Truth: I am a pretty good guy. I have good manners and a reasonable temperament. However, the times that I am ungrateful are too often and they are a major drain on my relationships. They are a drain on my happiness. They are a drain on my energy. If I could cut my ungrateful moments by just 10%, I would be living a completely new life. If I continued to increase the margin, who knows what potential riches and happiness I may find.

Here's the thing: when I say "thank you" sincerely, I have sent a message to that person. If they are listening, they now know what I like, that they will be recognized for their efforts, and that I will likely return the favor one day. Therefore, they will be more likely to do me another favor.

On the other hand, if someone does something nice for me and hears either complaints or silence, then they realize that their efforts are wasted on me. Furthermore, they may believe that doing me a favor is unethical; it would simply enable me to believe that my ingratitude is okay and my egomania is justified. They will deny me favors to prevent the monster from growing.

I have this feeling that I am way below where I could be in my career, education, and status. Part of the reason is because I have been hindered more often than I have been helped along the way. I have yet to find a mentor that really helps me along and reveals what I need to know in order to succeed. More often, I find people who hate me for no reason and they prevent me from feeling good, earning accolades, or getting promoted.

I think that the greatest obstacle to my success has been my ingratitude and sense of entitlement. I have always felt like I deserved better. People picked up on that and either withheld favors to avoid my ingratitude or set out to humble me and teach me gratitude. I always felt like I wasn't getting what I deserved; now I know that I am, in fact, getting exactly what I deserved.

Nothing reveals my ingratitude like adversity. As soon as life takes a turn, I am blaming and throwing a tantrum, rather than being thankful for what I have. When life is not going well, all I can think about is what I think I should have, what I think other people have, and how I should have something better. I think that I am better than other people, so I should have more than them. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Adversity should be an opportunity for me to count my blessings. I am a lucky man. If I never receive another thing in my life and live for another 100 years, that will be alright; I have received enough already for 200 years.

I hate my job. Not always, sometimes I "kinda" like my job but wish I was doing something else. I always have this sense that I should be higher up; a privileged decision-maker raking in the big bonuses. This is not only true of my current job, it is always true of every job I have ever had.

Focusing on the negative is a crappy way to live. it drags me down. I makes it harder to go in to work, and it prevents me from enjoying my day. From a self-centered, short-sited perspective alone, ingratitude is not beneficial.

Moreover, ingratitude sends a signal. To be more accurate, it puts out an odor. To desirable mentors or employers, I stink. They run away or conceal themselves when I approach; they do not want to waste their efforts on an ungrateful person who will trip over his own ungrateful feet.

If I can't be happy in my current job, what's to say that I will be happy in the next job? Or the next? The truth is that you are capable of creating your own happiness right where you are. People have been known to sing and laugh in concentration camps or on death beds. Happiness is inside of you, not outside. Therefore, if a hiring manager smells unhappiness, they will be repelled.

I believe that there are levels of communication that we transmit without knowing it. We pick up on communication subconsciously. We transmit and receive on levels we are not even aware of, such as through pheromones. There are probably channels of communication that we cannot detect with current instruments, we can only see their results.

Therefore, I firmly believe that your thoughts are more creative than you may realize. If you are always thinking along the lines of entitlement and ingratitude, you will communicate those thoughts on many different levels. You can try to cover up your rude and selfish nature, but it will be perceived by people all the same.

By thinking such thoughts, you repel good things from being offered to you. People who possess good things to give will avoid your ungrateful odor like the plague that it is. People who are unable to avoid you (family, etc.) will withhold their best gifts because they do not want to waste their effort and they do not want to encourage your piggish behavior.

I know this to be true. I can see the principle of ingratitude at work in my own life. I have also seen how my moments of gratitude have benefited me. I have seen truly grateful people get more than they asked for. I am sure that the principle of gratitude works even better than ingratitude.

Therefore, I am declaring myself a scientist, researching the principle of gratitude. I am the subject of my research. My life before now is the control, my life going forward is the experiement. I will begin to think thoughts of thanks. I will strive to find new things to be thankful for. I will strive to find more ways to express my gratitude.

This experiement will continue through December 20, 2008. After that day, if I do not notice a remarkable leap of happiness and prosperity, I will conclude that excessive gratitude is a waste of effort and a farce; I will return to my normal level of cynicism, depression, and frustration.

My hypothesis, however, is that I will be a completely different man on December 21, 2008. I will be happier. I will have more good things in my life. Even if I suffer tragedy and loss, through gratitude I will attract good things to compensate. Really, how can I go wrong with gratitude in all things?

Explanation of Hiatus

There were many reasons for me to take a hiatus from blogging. When I boiled it all down, I was left with one main reason: I didn't want to suck.

Now, I never set out to achieve blogging greatness. This blog was created for personal expression, for writing development, for ego validation, and to add my 2 cents to the internet. I never intended to spend the time and effort to make this blog world-famous; my family and career are more important and carry more potential for my self-actualization goals.

However, I always intended to be read. I wanted people to read my blog and usually come away with new thoughts or knowledge. I did not want to bore people. It is hard not to blog your opinions without a little self-indulgence and borderline arrogance, but I never wanted to come off as a know-it-all. Worse still, I never wanted to be that guy who is so impressed with his own brilliance that he can no longer critically read himself or receive honest feedback from others.

Also, I realize that I write too many words--especially for a blog entry. A reader wants only a few paragraphs from a blog so that they can get on with their life, but that is a real challenge for me.Even in school: when an instructor says 5-7 pages and everyone else is wondering how they can write that many pages, I have trouble cutting ten pages down to seven.

I had many brilliant things to say about life, CSR, politics, etc. Or, so I thought. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I had a lot more learning and thinking to do before I would become as smart as I think I am. I needed to refine my thoughts in order to achieve brevity and insightfulness simultaneously. I found that I could only prevent bad-blogging through abstinence.

So I spent a few weeks thinking, evaluating, and trying to achieve a reasonable humility. Humility for me is arrogance for others; it is a relative term and I set my own standard for humility at a more-inflated level than others might. Therefore, if you think to yourself that my attempt at humility has a long way to go, realize I have come pretty far down and I am trying to stay grounded.

I feel bad about not blogging regularly. I hate having gaps in my blog archive. I don't know why I feel that way, though. A gap means that I had nothing pressing to say and chose to remain silent. That is rare in this culture. Every channel on the TV is jammed pack with nothing to say; the best shows are rarely broadcast to maximize their advertising revenue while the drivel fills in the gaps that should just be static.

To sum up, this is Phase II of my blogging. I am now seeking brevity and insightfulness. If my blog entry cannot edify the reader quickly, then it needs to be refined rather than posted. I write to develop my thoughts and skill; however, there is no sense in writing if it is not readable by others. I write for myself, and I write for you to read. This blog is my gift to you, whomever you are. Thank you for taking the time to read me.